“Iron sharpens iron; so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend” – Proverbs 27:17
Before now, I thought I had all the understanding of what
friendship meant. But trust me, I’m not a novice in relationship, not because I write about it often, at least I
have some empirical facts I had known over the years.
But there are many who do not understand what
friendship meant. The likes of boyfriends or girlfriends is
an understanding of what many thought to be the essence
of friendship. Is that the whole purpose of having friends?
That scripture above made me to have a different understanding of having friends. It’s not new to me but the light of God’s word just dawn afresh on me relating to it.
Friendship is the condition of being friends with a person.
They could be friends of the same-sex or opposite sex. The
depth of friendship is more than being class mate, course
mate, room mate or other types of ‘mate’ people have. There’s a bond of intimacy in friendship, a knitting of souls
just as it is with the case of David and Jonathan in the
Bible. Friendship is often term as the spice of life but these
days, it no longer seem true.
There are now friends for benefits, one party becomes the
prey while the other becomes the host. Benefits in such
friendship aren’t mutual and some believe that sex
between opposite sex relationship is needed to keep the
relationship aglow. (surprised!)
However, two things happen when you maintain
1. A good one sharpens your life
A good friend doesn’t wear a wristband bearing ‘good’ on it
but the influence they exert on your life makes them so.
Many people do not know that there’s an influence your
friend would have on you if you are weak willed. Whether
consciously or unconsciously, you’ll imbibe some of their
Good friends are rare to find because they won’t tell you
what you want to hear but the truth that your life needs.
They’re not timid to correct your errors because they are
blunt and realistic.
They keep you on your toes and ensure that you’re up and
doing. They’re not intimidated by your success but would
ensure you don’t allow it get into your head. They exert
positive influence on your life which you can attest to.
When they come into your life, they improve the condition
of your life in virtually all aspect. With them, you’d learn
one or two things that you’d never forget in your life.
Do you have such friend?
2. A bad one will ‘blunt’ your life
Lots of singles are into a relationship with a bad friend or
friends. They don’t appear as evil but their influence on
their life makes them so.
I had a discussion with a friend of mine, he said when he was in the university, he remember a room mate and course mate of his who mingled with another friend of ours. One night, they came back from a party and they were drunk. The following night he came back to his senses, he was complaining bitterly how the guy was a bad influence in his life.
Many of the boyfriend and girlfriend relationship that
many keep is a friendship that has ‘whet’ their sword. Once
he comes into your life, he puts your life in a mess, makes
you lose interest in the things of God unlike before or un-
learn some of your good values. And the same thing
happens to the female folks too.
Because of the emotional grip they have on your life, they
are difficult to let go. The longer they stay, the terrible it
becomes for you.
I can go on and on to give you their characteristic but I am
sure now that a part of you is telling you about the one
that’s exerting a bad influence on your life. Wouldn’t you
rather take the bull by the horn to un-friend them before
your life gets to an irreparable stage?
Take a cursory look at your present relationship, what
influence does it have on your spiritual, mental, academical, financial, emotional or social life? If all you
enjoy is social or emotional bliss while other departments
of your life suffer a retrogress, then it calls for a rethink.
Any friend you have that doesn’t sharpen your countenance (life) would definitely blunt your life. It is not by
how many friends you have, it’s about their quality and
And if perhaps you find it difficult to get a good one, have
you found a friend in Jesus? He’s everything you need in a
friend – a confidant, a counselor, a comforter, name it! I
treasure my friendship with Him than anyone.
I’d rather advice that you first make Him your friend because one alone with God is better than majority. He will
make your life better than what you think you could ever
become in life.
Remember, you are a reflection of the kind of friends you
have and always remember this saying “Show me your friend and I will tell you who you are”