Story: Destiny Delayed But Unchanged….Episode 3
Destiny Delayed But Unchanged….
I didn’t sleep all through the night, when all the time I was having to sleep is spent on crying about Micheal and I. I can’t say the reason why I’m crying exactly but I think it’s got something to do with the fact that he hurt my feelings and because I can’t understand why I allowed him get to me that much.
I did cheat on Micheal at the beginning of our relationship and I was genuinely sorry when he found out. We weren’t all that serious when it happened and I knew it hurt him but I tried my best to make it up to him. After winning his affection back, I thought we were past it. He did act like we were past it. Why in God’s name did it now come up again last night? Does this implies that he never forgave me?
I check my wristwatch, it is 6am. A very good time to start getting ready to leave. I ditch my clothes for my towel and I’m almost in the bathroom when I hear a knock. Its 6am, why is anyone knocking the door at this time?
“Please come in” I respond and Micheal’s mom walks in.
“I’m sorry to disturb you dear, but there’s something I need from this room. Hope you slept well?”
I nod and manage a smile. “Ekaaro ma” I add and then I try to proceed into the bathroom.
“Why are you up so early by the way? Nobody ever gets up early in this house…”
“I’m leaving ma” I say and I realise immediately that I shouldn’t have told her the real reason I’m up early. She will try to find out why and talking about last night is the last thing I want to do.
“Did you and Micheal fight?”
The result of revealing my reason for waking early to Micheal’s mum, is sitting opposite Micheal in his father’s private study room and trying to “settle things” with him like his mum thinks.
We haven’t said a word to each other yet. All we are doing at the moment is looking everywhere but at each other.
He is staring at his fingers and I am counting the number of books on the shelves and then looking at the fan and the calendar and….
“You did hurt me,” he said and I drag my gaze to him, but he’s still not looking at me.
“Wait you aren’t going to apologize?…” I asked.
“Let me finish” he cuts in and this time he actually looks at me. “After you cheated, I forgave you…it was hard but I let it go. I was in love with you and being with you made more sense than letting you go, but our incessant fights after and your coldness I couldn’t take…”
I am speechless and spellbound not by his speech but by his expression. He looks hurt!
My heart breaks knowing I’m responsible for his pain. I feel bad.
“Rebecca, yesterday night shouldn’t have happened. I shouldn’t have mentioned it and I’m sorry.”
I nod. He reaches for my hands and adds “please let it go”
“I’m sorry too” I say to him and I truly mean it.
“Oh…what are you guys doing in here…alone?” Linda banged in on us.
We both turn to face our company and I swallow hard as I watch her eye me with contempt and suspicion.
“I decided to stay again when she saw me in the study alone with her fiancé, with nothing on but a tank and towel…I’m trying to make her feel at ease. If I’d left, it would have looked like I was running away from something or that Micheal and I are hiding something. I don’t want her to walk down the aisle with doubts in her mind…”
“You mean like Micheal will?” David asks and I don’t understand him.
“I don’t get…” I inquire. After Linda caught me with her husband-to-be some hours ago in the study with nothing on but a towel tied across my chest and a tank to cover it, she’s been acting cold. I felt guilty instantly and changed my mind about leaving town and now I’m in a car with Micheal’s driver on the way to church for the wedding rehearsal.
I called David who I have been ignoring his missed calls because of his response last night and after I accept his apology, I fill him in on the details he’s missed out on. He can be a pain on my back sometimes, but he’s still my best friend always.
“You said you don’t want her to have doubts…” He continues
I nod like he can see me “yes. You know, seeing her fiancé and his ex in the study alone can spring up numerous silly thoughts.”
“All I’m saying is I’m sure Micheal will be walking down the aisle two days from now with doubts on his mind”
“Why would you even think that. He’s in love with her, I’ve seen the way he looks at her”
“Are you trying to convince yourself Rebecca? Because I’m not convinced and all you’ve told me about both of you in the last twelve hours looks to me like you both still have strong feelings for each other. I mean, what’s the explanation for all that emotion you both had all over the place last night?”
I didn’t say anything. I literally can’t speak.
David continues, “If you must stay there, steer clear of the groom. He’s clearly still in love with you”
“How would you even know that?” I ask. He can’t be serious… it can’t be true.
“Because I am a man. And some things we only do when we feel so strongly about someone.”
And my heart once again, begins to race.
I sat six rows away from Linda and Micheal when we arrive at the church. Just as I had decided not to ride with them on purpose from home, I have decided to let them have all the space they need, away from me.
There still seems to be chemistry between Micheal and I, which I can’t even lie to myself about. But I am not here to take him away from the woman he wants to marry. I mean, he refused to work things out with us and proposed to her instead. It means he doesn’t want us and he’s ready to live without me.
And that I totally understand and I’m willing to let him have his happily ever after. I’m not even going to believe a word of what David says about him because I’m sure Micheal is over me… Over us.
I fiddle with my Blackberry Q10 and try not to look in their direction. Truth be told, I’m not all that comfortable with watching them. But again, nobody forced me to come here for this wedding.
The bridesmaids begin to walk in one after the other and I’m grateful we have company in the almost empty church.
I watch them all as they greeted me politely and went on to chat with the bride. She seems to be arguing with Micheal over something and I prayed silently that it had better get nothing to do with me.
Linda smiles at her friends as they all giggle and talk about her cake and their dresses and shoes and whatever. This spells out clearly that those are her real friends. I’m not a friend. I shouldn’t be her maid of honour; I shouldn’t be acting like I am. This is another chance to walk away from this insanity, I decide. And I am on my feet, about to walk over to her when the pastor walks into the church.
Ok. I hope to get another chance.
We all move to the front row and once again, I distance myself from the couple and I’m glad the bridesmaids are too excited and I’m almost not seen.
I’m still thinking of how tush their church is, organising a wedding rehearsal when the pastor tells us all to come take our place.
My church won’t even do this. Them get time?
I saw the groom’s mum and whom I think might be the bride’s mom walk in. No father in sight. Making more money for the wedding maybe? Or maybe they can’t just be bothered with wedding rehearsal when the real wedding is the koko.
The pastor assumes his position and we all get ready.
Before I made this trip, I told myself a million and one times over that I am ready for it. But now, as I walk in behind the bride and watch Micheal smile as she inches closer, I can’t take it.
The reality hits me in the face and suddenly I felt this sudden surge of pain and disappointment, knowing that I am going to lose Micheal forever. I want to leave this place but I decide to stay until it’s over.
Quit fooling yourself and ditch this maid of honour joke.
I agree with the thought in my head. I can’t do this.
We arrive at the altar and the pastor explains the part where Micheal says his vows. I didn’t pay much attention to them so all he’s saying is lost on me.
“Oya Micheal…. you go first” I hear the pastor say.
“I Micheal Adetunji, take you Rebecca…”
Ah!.. Everyone shouted.
How was Micheal able to save his marriage from crashing after such a terrible mistake of uttering Rebecca’s name?
-To Be Continued-